Sunday, January 4, 2009

New Year's Resolution Number One

I've decided to do a series of posts on my New Year's resolutions. One at a time. I'll post as I think of them and definitely NOT in any order of importance. In fact, almost none of my resolutions will be important! :) So . . . drum roll . . . Number One IS:

Watch more junk television!

Now, you ask, who the heck would make a resolution like THAT? Well, I was obsessed with cable news channels like CNN, MSNBC, etc... this past year watching the dire economic news of the day and all the election news. And look what THAT did for me. So, about 3 or 4 prescriptions later, I vow to turn the channel from CNN to lighter programs where I can get a good laugh!

Friday morning on the elliptical at the gym, I was watching CMT (Country Music Television for those of you who are junk-television deprived) and got the best laugh out of a state of the art device they were advertising. The Loud N Clear. If you buy now, they'll send you two for $19.95. Why wear a hearing aid when you can wear a cheap amplifier that looks like a gigantic Bluetooth! You can fool the rest of the Q-Tips at the Bingo Hall into thinking you're a proud Bluetooth owner and actually know how to use it! Or -- be a spy at Friday Happy Hour and eavesdrop on comments across a crowded bar! (Man, look at those hooters! Are they fake or real?) Take a walk in the neighborhood and hear the amplified sound of your neighbors yelling at their kids. Or, God forbid, wear it to the next family get-together and get blasted by the sounds of relatives' flatulence. (Sorry, maybe you don't have a Cousin Hal.)

Here's the ad on YouTube! BINGO!

CMT also has My Redneck Wedding, Bravo has The Housewives of Orange County, NBC has Mama's Boy, etc... So many possibilities, so little time!

The point is -- get more laughs in 2009! :)


Jamqueen said...

I watch some of those shows--I don't go searching them out but if they're on.... my big redneck wedding is a hoot! Always good for a laugh--depressing because I think the participants are serious!. The real housewives of Orange county and Atlanta are unbelievable! Such excess & waste!

jeanie said...

Toooo funny Beck! I was so upset that Santa didn't bring me a missile for my ear so I could DISCREETLY listen in. Our fave junk TV dejour is Trailer Park Boys.Filmed in Nova Scotia, It has a cult following around the world.

Moongrl722 said...

Beck, you crack me up. I stopped watching tv almost altogether this year and have gotten so much other stuff done. I heartily endorse any New Years Resolution that involves more fun and frivolity as I believe that those two things are essential in one's daily life!!! My nomination for bad tv is MTV Brett Michaels' Rock of Love. We watched a couple of episodes in Isla (my husband just HAS to turn on the tv every once in a while after a week) and it was unbelievable to me how stupid some people are!!

Life's a Beach! said...

And I thought I was the only one who watched this stuff! Ha! Ann, I got hooked on watching the real housewives by watching reruns at the gym. Excess is right (but the new season of Orange County starts Tuesday night)! Jeanie, I'll have to check out Trailer Park Boys, but we may not get it here. In Seattle, Comcast carried some Canadian networks, but not here. We get some Mexican channels instead. And Jana, practically all the cable package on Isla carries in English is junk! :) I've watched some of it on my solo trips. I'll have to check out Rock of Love!

Vee said...

Beck, thanks for the morning giggles. (Well, at least it's still morning for another hour and a half - being LAZY today.) That commercial is a hoot! I like the sentiment behind your resolution.

Isla Deb said...

Count me in. I've had about enough of depressing news. I'd much rather watch a redneck wedding than hear about how the economy is in the toilet. lol